Well as everyone knows, today is the last day of 2013, and in these last few moments of the year I look back and think how much I’ve accomplished. There’s is so much that I have done without even realizing it. There is so much that happened that I haven’t even thought twice about it. It’s really funny how we realize all that has happened in a year on the last day of the year. Most importantly, looking back on 2013 makes me realize what I haven’t done. Nobody will ever be perfect and there will always be room to improve, but if you find yourself thinking about what’s different , at the end of the year, and still haven’t improved anything then there’s definitely a problem. See, I am not a person to sugar coat anything and as 2014 begins my blog posts, I think, will become more honest. I want to become a new person, rebuild and reform myself into a new me, so then I can face my fears with a boldly and not cowardly. I’m known by some to be out going, but I’m also known to have a slight temper. If anything for 2014 all I want is to loose that temper and be more patient, even if I’m still a coward I rather not have a temper. I want that temper gone so maybe then I won’t be agitated at so many. I think a way for me to do that is to have a jar, actually two jars (I’ve seen this idea on tumblr a gazzillion times). The reason why to have two jars is, one for all my happy moments and once for all my angry ones, and I hope by the end of 2014 I’ll have a million and one happy moments and very few angry ones. SO to all my readers out there, leave me a comment let me know what you think of this idea or suggestions and what change do you want for 2014? HAPPY NEW YEAR!
In this world we’re born with one face, but nowadays it seems common to have more than one. What I’m talking about is have double personalities just to get what you desire. Why is it so hard to do things these days without stupid politics coming in play, and no I’m not talking about governmental politics. I’m talking about the things people do to get what they want. They’ll treat you according to what the want from you. It makes me sick. I hate having to play along because what does that make me? Am I just like them? I don’t want be like them, but rather just have one face and where it around everywhere. The double, triple, quadruple personality is not what should be a norm, but sadly, it’s what is becoming the norm. You give one person hope and excitement only to use them for a short time because they become a threat to who you are. There are days when I just want to scream, you’re fake, a lie, a two faced person, but who am i to do such a thing. One day, their act will be over and I’ll be able to breathe fresh air instead of polluted air. Until that day comes I won’t let myself conform fully to the two faced life. I’m going to try my best to be me, and if that mean breaking down the walls in my own life, then so it be. I Will Be Me. As I mentioned in my first blog post, I know I’ll write offensive stuff, but I need to find a release a place to be me. This is what this blog is for me. I will break the free on here, and let all my wall crumble down. I will be brave on here
As my first year as a college student I face many challenges everyday, but , I think, my greatest challenge so far is discovering myself. I know the pressure of getting good grades as my first semester ends, but I also want to know where I fall and belong. Maybe this just the little kid in me wanting to grow up too fast, and maybe I’m the only one who wants to feel important. Most of the time the people around me have the motto of ” you do you” but even so don’t they want a place of importance? It’s probably just me, carrying an emotion far too old and deep in myself. I’m still young and very well aware of that, but why am I constantly feeling this way? Is it insecurity or something else? If there is one thing I am aware of is that I don’t feel this way due to lack of love. In fact, I am greatly loved by my family and friends ( I hope ). An immediate is answer to this is not possible, but I just want to know am I the only one who wants this? Am I the only one who wants importance in life? Or am I just crazy and letting curiosity of this emotion kill the cat? Is there anyone like me?
I’ve finally done it. I finally listened to my advisors and the many others in my life, and I have finally built up the courage and made a blog page. I don’t know if this is right for me or would it make a difference in my life, but that is a risk I am willing to take. I know what I just wrote may sound over dramatic or mushy, but for me this is a challenge. I don’t know if the things I write are relevant to people are or even important. I hope creating a blog embarks me onto a journey full of creativity and opportunity. This will be like a secret journal for me, I’ll be taking you all on trip into my feelings, my thoughts, my world. Please enjoy my blog and if I say anything offensive forgive me in advance.